There’s a lot going in my head and I wish I could tell you how I feel, You’d feel it too, if I let you. I hurt myself and not feel it and smile I’ll go circles around the same old mistakes That feels like a way of life now. I’m burning bridges one day the others I’m on fire MYSELF Pushing you away will be my first step after getting to know you That’s what I do I push people so hard that, coming back is not an option for them I like it. I don’t want to feel vulnerable. If I let my guard down you’d see the void, like the gravity of black holes it’ll suck you in too They say you should avoid the dark. The darker it is, the harder it is There’s darkness inside me that is gonna consume me one day One day I’ll be so dark within that, I’d suck light in and not radiate it back I’d be the black hole. I’d be the monster I was scared to become Stone cold, heart broke, feeling no more I’ll go take that knife of trust and stab you until to bleed your insecurities and I’ll watch you die the most painful death of love and you’ll watch me become the monster I am You’ll scream for help You try to run but I’ll overpower you and pull you near me, But then I’d hear a beat in your heart and I let you go I try to listen to mine shrunk in the corner Crying for help, Trying to fight it, If I win you’ll see me new, Else I’ll be the same old blue. Going darker and darker with every shade, with every kill, Going madder and madder, Until one day I see peace.
Autumn’s here. Mid semester when it feels real. I hate life, is all I know. I look at the Moon and start to know This, Isn’t what I want to be. Wasn’t how it was meant to be. I was born to rule. Why am I doing this slavery? My heart beats, Breaks on every beat. Pain is the comfort I live in. I surround, Myself with greef. Greiving the lonely lie my life has made me. Do we all feel it this way? Does it hurt the same way? Eyes like the fairy tale Hiding secrets like a veil, You think you know me But I pretend well You hate this, But I can’t help, I feel what I want to, I try and hide it like I can You never understand It wasn’t about how it was meant to be. Rather how we made it to be. -shree
Your insides were wrenching , constantly had just one thought in mind “maybe I should just say no”, you still answered positive.Been there? ever said yes to individual power point presentations on stage out of sheer peer pressure? well saying yes was no big deal, what about actually being on stage?alone…honestly if you find this relatable than perhaps you should just continue reading and if you don’t then definitely read this.Nobody is born bold, and the idea of being bold is sometimes mistakenly or not misinterpreted. Aggression and confidence are never the synonym for being bold. Your voice cannot decide your boldness and neither your physique will. What decides your boldness is how strong you stood when your were supposed to fall,boldness doesn’t come from the outfit you wear,it comes from fighting your battles all alone.when at all those times you thought you wouldn’t survive long but you did, you grew bold.When your were struggling hard to keep pieces of you together and you wouldn’t let them fall apart, you were bold.When you weren’t confident at all that you could draw well/write better/read more/sing good/dance harder but you just gave it a shot, seriously man you were bold.You are bold when you don’t make a fuss about all the hardships that your facing.Being bold was never about courage, being bold was always about staying calm and patient and dealing with shit no one else dares to.Being bold is about willingness to make things right when they go wrong.Being bold is just willing to give the best shot.Being bold is not beautiful,its ugly,its painful but its strong.
None of you reading this will claim yourself being flawless, all of us have a past where we have made terrible mistakes and we truly regret that for obvious reasons.In some or the other way those mistakes have influenced our present ,may even influence our future,some mistakes made us who we are today ,some of you have reason for being an introvert,some of you be good to others because you remember the mistake you made in your past that costed someone a great deal of pain,some of you might be bad asses just because you’re past has given you terrible experiences, maybe a mistake of yours or others but ever wondered why do we make mistakes? some great man said ‘Mistakes are the proof that you’re growing’,I totally agree with him,indeed it shows that you are trying,but…It even means that you’re not trying enough, every mistake you made is a proof that you still need to grow,you still need to make yourself better, all the competitive exams you couldn’t clear just because you didn’t know that one concept,that one formula,that one unit,that one value,all of it costed you a destiny,no wonder you might be doing good right now but you could do better,what sort of a world would this be if all those scientists didn’t thrive for perfection, if they did not learn from every mistake they made,if they gave the reason that their mistake is the proof that they’re trying? we would better be in stone age, I do not mean that making mistakes is not accepted,indeed it is but that does not mean that in this short span of your life you just cannot keep on making mistakes,there has to be some remarkable positive output of every mistake you ever made,because when you die you don’t want people to say he kept on making mistakes his whole life,you want them to say he made a life time history,he learnt from his mistakes,he grew,he changed,became stronger,smarter and he achieved…
In the above context the word perfection does not refer to a universal definition, it refers to the individual point of perception,perfection for me can be leading a simple life,for you it may be fitness,for some it may be academics,for others it may be their own world of how they perceive perfection.whatever it maybe your limit must always tend to perfection and your mistakes should tend to zero,because you want to be defined.
Such a interesting thing this quality of human is, except for the physical attributes of a human being,Attitude is the only factor that separates us from fellow beings.So I believe our attitude towards life is what defines the happiness of our lives,we fall more often than we rise,every fall has some deep cuts,some piercing through our bodies and some through our souls, some of them heal with time,some remain with nasty scars.So how have we managed to get through all of the pain?how did we manage to rise everyday again? was it not our attitude?NO NO… I’m not speaking of the never giving up attitude,For Gods sake no. I’m telling you of the attitude that resides in each one of us, the attitude that we are hopeless enough to try that chicken samosa one last time when you know you’re gonna gain calories enough to bounce your belly,we are hopeless enough to snooze our alarms for the hundredth time,but not willing to get up,hopeless enough to procrastinate our end semester preperations until the last day,hopeless enough to know that our lives are getting fucked up and still having no clue as to why are we even existing,how hopeless… but despite of being hopeless enough we still manage to be happy ,still manage to enjoy that one night ride with our best friend, that one talk with our crush makes us build castles in air, going to the same old meet up place for 235556986th time and mesmerising it from the first day, going insane on that lyrics of the recently released song of that one favourite singer,listening that one song on repeat for weeks together,going back to the same old song when you feel empty,earphones taking us to the world to stars and leaving behind the wicked souls,cherishing that one flunk in that one damn subject which you knew you’d dump with your BFF,reading that one book by the window side with hot coffee in hands and rain pouring out with all the greenery surrounded by side though still a dream but such a happiness, that happiness in insulting best friend ,beating siblings black and blue LOL…so much more to cherish isn’t it? despite all the misery,we live,with attitude…our attitude towards life…is indeed the key to happiness.
I was “today” years old when I got to know that we could create our own blog,sounds funny that at times the simplest of the things disguise to take the most complex of their forms.I never knew I was fond of writing until at a point in my life I started rewinding back to everything I had been doing till date, I realised it was all writing that i did,that’s where i felt it was all about pouring it all until you’re inside out.You never know what is awaiting you,until this morning I did not know I would create a site of my own,but now here i am pouring it all…